"Join Me" by Danny Wallace.

"So these days I seemed to be doing a lot of sitting down.A lot of glancing about.A lot of wondering wether or not I should be doing something else. Something more important. Something for which someone would actually pay me some money. In an ideal world of course, Id have Patrick Moore's job, already being his number one rival for just sitting on a chair, staring into space."
"I know what I want out of life, and by gracious I know how to get it. But what I want out of life is usually a nice cup of tea and a biscuit, and how to get it involves nothing more than a short stroll to the kitchen, so I m not sure if that really counts alongside the achievements of others."